A few years back, I decided I wanted to buy my first motorcycle. At the time I didn’t know how to ride one – I didn’t really know anything about them at all – so I just started searching Craigslist at random. I ran across an ad with the headline, “faster than a raped ape, faster than a cheetah on cocaine.” I wasn’t sure I was after a bike like that, but certain I wanted to meet the crazy bastard behind the post…